Puerto Rican Medical Disorders

Monga: Mysterious body temperature, not high enough to be considered fever, but serious enough to miss school and work. Illness is unknown by the American Medical Association (AMA) and only understood by doctors of Puerto Rican origin.

Patatú: Attack of obscure origin that can strike at any time. Could be serious enough to require hospitalization, yet is undetected by medical technology. Victims tend to be males and females over the age of 50 years.

Occurs when someone steps outdoors suddenly at night and is sprinkled by a mysterious substance produced by the night air. There are no physical symptoms and the Puerto Rican elderly can only detect it. The effect of having this disease is unknown. Children must not be taken out at night without proper headgear or risk of contamination is certain.

Digestive disorder which occurs after the consumption of a large Puerto Rican meal.
The only known cure for this disease is "tirarse una buena criolla" or "tirarse un buen peo" (Alka-Seltzer is completely ineffective).

Cuerpo Cortao: Frequent and mild condition of unknown etiology. Symptoms include but are not limited to fatigue, lack of energy and chronic whining.

Moño Parao: Psychological imbalance of short duration that causes strange mood swings, violent irritating behavior as well as general unpleasantness.

Chichón: Elevated cranial protrusion usually caused by the fall after a patatú.

9 comentarios:

Mary Poppins dijo...

Se te quedo "bioco"....

disorder caused by abrupt change in scenario or atmosphere..can be accompanied by "Patatu"..

Happy Thanksgiving..que NO comas tanto pavo!!

La Caribeña dijo...

Ah, te falta, esmamoniao:

Strange and obscure disease, similar to "cuerpo cortao" and manifests itself by leaving the victim in a lethargic mode for several hours, even days.

Estela dijo...

Pasmar, Pasmao' = disorder or catatonic phase produced by opening the refrigerator after physical exercise. Usually diagnosed by grandmothers.


~Blue Angel*~ dijo...

hahaha esta brutal esto, y estoy de acuerdo con Estela, se quedo pasme

Kahlúa Macarena dijo...

jaja... muy buenos todos... XD

Joel dijo...

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaajajjajajajaja ay, ay, dios aaaajajajjaaja
se me salen las lágrimas de la risa.

a la verdad es que tenemos una de enfermedades autóctonas...

me encató la de Pasmarse.

Iguana Lola dijo...

Todavia recuerdo a mi nana diciendome: "Nena, no salgas al sereno que te da un patatú".

Me muero de la risa.

Yuliana dijo...

Yo padezco mucho de "Moño Parao" y "Cosa Mala".

Kahlúa Macarena dijo...

ah no, yuliana... ahora tienes que definir "cosa mala". ;o)